"If you don't have one, you're a loser."

So reads the English-language copy at the bottom of a poster in the window of an Apple "authorized reseller" on Hongmei Road in Shanghai. To Americans, it's another funny bit of long-in-translation Chinglish. But, increasingly, it's a bit of dead serious marketplace analysis in China. When the brand's history is written, the week that it announced sales numbers in China that Apple's CEO called "mind-boggling" may be remembered as the moment Apple's future moved from the West to the East. 

Indeed, a Bloomberg report found that everyone in China from "teachers to furniture makers" were snapping up iPhones because, as a Beijing teacher put it, "A lot of people in my office use it and said I should get one, so I did." But it's beyond the gainfully employed. Even low-earning migrant workers in Shanghai want an iPhone, and demand it by brand name.

In a (legitimate) massage shop not far from the Hongmei Apple "authorized reseller" where an hour-long foot massage can be had for 46 yuan (about $7.60), a masseuse quizzes me about my iPhone. He says he would love to have one. He arrived in Shanghai three years ago from Shaolin (the city famous for kung fu), and has no plans to go back because, he says, "The jobs pay nothing and are all hard."Continue reading...

Vows review after captain goes berserk in mid-air (and a New York Post punning cover).

Los Angeles Dodgers sell for record $2 billion to group including Magic Johnson.

Foxconn banks on Apple future with Sharp investment. And in other news:

Airbus faces more woes as A380s abandon flights.

BATS chairman plans to give up post.

Bank of America turns focus to overseas markets.

Budweiser snags naming rights at Texas Rangers' center field.

EBay targets growth in India.

Fox pulls trailer for Ben Stiller movie Neighborhood Watch in wake of Trayvon Martin death.

GM consolidates global Chevrolet ad account with Omnicom and Interpublic.Continue reading...

Former Goldman Sachs exec Greg Smith revealed in his now infamous resignation letter published in the New York Times that some GS employees refer to clients as "Muppets." Now, The Muppets are striking back — via a (somewhat) NSFW video produced by Funny or Die.

Apple's iPhone beats BlackBerry in its homeland; and could one day be made out of glass and function as a universal remote control.

AT&T sued over alleged deaf calls scam.

Bank of America tests rental program as alternative to foreclosure.

Bit.ly ranks U.S. news outlets.

Credit Suisse cuts CEO's pay 55%.

Dove launches self-esteem campaign in the U.K.

Etch A Sketch owner capitalizes on Romney-spurred attention.

Facebook strips privacy from new user policy, reportedly buys 750 patents from IBM.

FedEx called to task by Obama administration.Continue reading...

AB InBev extends U.S. Olympic/Team USA sponsorship.

Boeing tussles with Indian government over delays in delivering Dreamliner to airline.

Burger King posts a healthy quarter.

Cisco announces intent to buy NDS for $5 billion to add TV software.

Firefox plans sharing on social networks in its update.

Fox sees American Idol get black eye over finalist's arrest record.

GBTV seeks to expand internet viewing of Glenn Beck's show and other programming.

GM says Volt is under political microscope.

Goldman Sachs loses $2.2 billion after NYT "Why I'm quitting" op-ed.

Google may replace phone ring tones with ads; and refreshes its search function.Continue reading...

Burning up Wall Street and the virtual Wall Street that is Twitter and Facebook, not to mention inspiring wags such as the UK's Daily Mash (above) and US humorist Andy Borowitz — you've no doubt already read Goldman Sachs' exec Greg Smith’s excoriating resignation letter published as a take-no-prisoners op-ed column in The New York Times today. Goldman, no surprising, rejected Smith's accusations in the 'other' paper of record, the Wall Street Journal.Continue reading...

BMW faces snafu in Europe marketing a Mini cold front.

Boeing checks 787 Dreamliners for possible delamination.

Eli Manning's star rises with second Super Bowl win, edging personal brands of brother Peyton and rival Tom Brady.

Facebook is challenged by monetizing mobile.

Ford says majority of big-market dealers are on board for investments in Lincoln brand.

GM aims for $10 billion in annual profit.

Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein emerges as corporate spokesman for same-sex marriage.

HP nods toward activist investors.

Honda pulls forward major changes to struggling Civic this fall.Continue reading...

Jobs, jobs, jobs — they remain a topic utmost on Americans' minds as the slowly dropping unemployment rate largely belies the reality of a U.S. labor market that is only slowly picking up momentum. Brand executives know this, and more of them have taken to wielding job creation as a branding device, like Subway.

But corporate strategy sometimes dictates a different turn even when eliminating jobs is the last thing a brand wants to do. Among the big brands announcing layoffs in recent days: Novartis, which is restructuring its U.S. business and cutting 1,960 positions; Goldman Sachs, which laid off 2,400 employees last year with more to come; Citigroup, which is shedding about 5,000 jobs globally; Kraft, which announced that it will cut 1,600 North American jobs as it prepares to split into two companies. All eyes are on Kodak, too, as the company prepares to restructure.

Kraft — which made headlines with one high-profile hire in the past year: golden-voiced homeless-to-Hollywood phenom Ted Williams, at top — is now shedding ballast in order to survive a difficult future, where its strategy is to split into a global snack company and a North American grocery operation later this year.Continue reading...