Crown Jewels? Off With Their Heads!


The product: Crown Jewels

The description: “To celebrate the engagement of Prince William of Wales to Ms. Catherine Elizabeth Middleton, Crown Jewels Condoms of Distinction has commissioned a unique heritage edition Royal Wedding Souvenir boîte de capotes.” (That’s “condoms,” you commoners.)

The tagline: “Lie back and think of England.”

The fine print: “Crown Jewels Royal Wedding Souvenir Condoms are a novelty condom not suitable for contraception or protection against STDs.”

The reaction: Predictably, the editor of Majesty magazine calls these “condoms of distinction” a royal outrage.